Massacre: The Twin Lords

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DJS
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Massacre: The Twin Lords

Postby DJS » Sat Aug 08, 2015 9:50 pm

The office of the Sabbath Regime is in turmoil, and it all resolves around a phone. Pressed to the ear of Amy Taylor, there are long pauses as she paces around the room. Even though we cannot hear the actual words coming from the other side of the call, we can still hear some pretty hefty ranting coming from the phone. All the while, Diamond Jack Sabbath- perennially-troubled General Manager of the XWA- sits in his chair, sideways, with one hand over his face. Trying not to listen.

AMY TAYLOR:
No...no of course not. He is here, yeah, but...no, he can't get to the phone now. Because he can't. We understand that but...

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Oh just cut the call, Aims.

Amy pauses and looks, shaking her head with frustration. She can't get a word in edgeways, let alone cut the call. Eventually, after a while...

AMY TAYLOR:
Yeah, okay, look, we have to go. I'm really sorry. We're halfway through the show. We'll speak to you later. Thanks, bye.

With a beep, she hangs the phone up and throws it onto the desk, like the conversation she's just had has created an irrational fear of phones.

AMY TAYLOR:
That was awful.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Get used to it. I'm not speaking to them.

AMY TAYLOR:
Oh come on, why not? I'm not taking all the whining and bitching from them, you're the GM, not me!

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Well you just had your ear bitten off, and you kept your cool. Do you really think I could keep my head? No, if we speak to them for any reason I'll give you some notes to take down to them from me. I'd end up telling them to shove something up their arse.

AMY TAYLOR:
Any word from Trace yet?

Jack snickers, ironically.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
When was the last time we had any word from him? You know, I've done a lot of thinking about this. When he appointed me as General Manager, I thought this was going to be a clean slate. But if I'm going to be really honest here, I think he saw the iceberg. He saw all of this coming- I think he had a feeling that when Jericho Shaw would lose the title, the entire fabric of the XWA would fall to pieces. He wasn't going to take the fall for that, so he shoved it onto me. The clever bastard. He's done it to me again.

AMY TAYLOR:
Well we're on borrowed time. We've got two months left until Zero Hour.

Jack sits up, suddenly back to his usual, bouncy self.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
And that's why I came prepared!

VOICE OFF-SCREEN:
Wonderful news!

But it is to be short-lived. The door to his office has been open this entire time, and someone has taken advantage. Jack and Amy look up, and suddenly Jack is back to slumping in his chair again with his head in his hands, as Amy stands face to face with the Chief Operating Officer of the XWA, Hector Alonzo Perez, who has not been seen regularly on XWA programming since he was kidnapped and tortured by Richard J Maxwell and Whisper's War.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Hi, Jack. Long time no chat, I would say. I am astounded that you're still keeping Ms. Taylor around. Why, I worked along side her during the whole Whisper's War fiasco and, well, that was in interesting experience. I'm certain you remember.

AMY TAYLOR:
What on Earth are you doing here?

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Official Board duty. In the event you were unable to give Julie Suede and the rest of the Board of Directors a direct solution over the phone tonight, I was sent here to get one from you verbally and report back. Looks like I arrived just on time. So go on then, what's your plan?

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
I'm not telling you anything.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Well, that's a shame. I shall have to go back empty-handed and then who knows, with the way they're talking after Winner Takes All, I'd be incredibly surprised if we even make it to the 100th Episode of Ma--

Amy hops forward.

AMY TAYLOR:
No...no. We...we do have a possible solution to this, don't we Jack?

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Fabulous. Let's hear it. Chop-chop.

Jack looks to Amy, who looks back and nods incessantly. As grouchy and non-compliant as Jack can be, Amy doesn't share this. She'd like to walk out of this arena with a job intact by the end of the night. Jack lets out a bit of a breath, doing what can only be referred to as the dispondent Martin Freeman face. He looks back to Hector and lets out a very small...

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
The Lord of the Ring.

And without any further elaboration, he sits back. That's it. There is a long silence as Hector looks to Jack, then to Amy, who looks back and then both look to Jack.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
The Lord of the Ring?

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Yeah.

And yet more silence from Jack, who now pulls up Angry Birds on his phone. Hector rolls his eyes in frustration, knowing very well that Jack could go into more detail here but is choosing not to.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Okay, so I suppose I'll have to ask the questions. Is Smith Jones is your answer to this?

Jack shakes his head, not even looking at Hector.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
But Smith Jones has it.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Mm-hmm.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
But he's not part of the company anymore. So what? You're planning to go to EWC and take it from him?

Angry Birds away, Jack sits back up, his intelligence being insulted.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
No. I'm not that nuts. You really think weaponising the XWA in it's current state is a good idea? No. Mac wouldn't stand for that. I'd like to avoid a war with everything else going on here at the moment.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
So what do you suggest?

He reaches into the draw of his desk, fiddling around and chucking out loads of papers and bits. He keeps searching until he finds a small black box.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
I found this on a visit to the old warehouse several months ago. In the midst of Little Tokyo, Vestal's shovels and bits of old cage...

He opens it, and there it is- the LOTR Ring. And not just any version of it...

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
This is the exact one surrendered to us by Jericho Shaw at Legends in London two years ago. The one that set off everything. I can't strip Smith Jones of his Lord Of The Ring privilages, but I can definitely give this to someone else.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
A second Lord of the Ring? But we can't! We don't have time for a tournament, Jack!

Jack shakes his head, smugly.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
I'm not saying there will be any new tournament. What would be the point when we've already had one this year? Think back to the final match of this year's Lord of the Ring. Only one of the three men who made it to Royal Court match is still with us. So really, in the long run, by default...there's only one person who can have this. Effective immediately, he will become the second Lord of the Ring for 2015.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
And if Smith Jones inexplicably returns?

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Then we have two Lords of the Ring at the same time. The Twin Lords! You can have that one if you'd like...actually, nah. It's mine.

Hector scratches his head and raises his eyebrows, surprises slightly that Sabbath's solution isn't totally batshit insane but is still questionable in some way.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
This had better work, Jack.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH (Laughing slighly):
Or what? This is my solution, not the Board of Directors. They unified the titles, this is their mess. I am doing this for the betterment and survival of Diamond Jack Sabbath's XWA, not for them.

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Except you're the General Manager. Ultimately you answer to us.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
I answer to no man, Hector. I'm the Innovator of A--

HECTOR ALONZO PEREZ:
Oh, stop it. You know what, your shtick has grown rather boring and tiresome over time. And let's face it, you stopped being the Innovator of Anarchy the moment you took this job. You're ours now, Jack. I'll report back to the Board now. Make this work, please.

With Hector's rather unprofessional outburst over and done with, he finally leaves, taking out his phone to make a call, presumably to Julie Suede of the Three Headed Dragons. Jack sits there, angry. Stoic. Has he really stopped being the Innovator of Anarchy?

AMY TAYLOR:
Now what do we do? Jack. What do we do?

With an angry deep breath, Jack snarls and scoops up the LOTR Ring, holding it out to Amy. This is HIS solution. HIS XWA. Julie Suede, Matt Gough, Jonathan Gilbert, Hector Alonzo Perez, the lot of them...they don't matter. This is Diamond Jack Sabbath's XWA. HE built it. There's only one man who can take this ring now. His doomsday device. He looks Amy deep in the eye as he grabs her hand and gives her the ring carefully, before giving her the final instruction.

DIAMOND JACK SABBATH:
Go and give this to Razer.

And with that, we fade to our next segment.
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