The Crusteez

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Methylated Spirit
Posts: 55
Joined: Wed Dec 23, 2015 5:36 pm
Location: UK

The Crusteez

Postby Methylated Spirit » Tue May 03, 2016 11:05 pm



Basic Info

The Crusteez
Chris Dolmeth & Jesse Cruset
521lbs/Five hundred and twenty one pounds (Dolmeth + Cruset)
Followers of an enigmatic new cult based heavily in the Satanic religion. They believe that Lord Azazel is the new Messiah born of the demon Azazel and has come to lead the world into a new era; one where society's standards, morals and rules are no more and only the basest of instincts are law. They will accept any and all into their ranks but will meet resistance without mercy.
Now that the enigmatic leader, Azazel, has gone A.W.O.L the Kvlt have become homeless punk rockers. Go figure. They're motivated by their Egalitarian worldview, and their borderline alcoholism. Their alliance is easily purchasable with a charitable donation of either booze money or actual booze. Hey, beggars can't be choosers and these guys are the closest to beggars the XWA is going to get. They believe that through the XWA and wrestling, they will eventually come upon the fabled "Big Rock Candy Mountain" - a land where they don't have to change their socks, and booze flows in streams from the rocks.


The Restarts - "Big Rock Candy Mountain"

Code: Select all


The intro to The Restarts' cover of “Big Rock Candy Mountain” blurts through the arena’s PA system as XWA’s resident homeless bums emerge from the backstage out onto the entrance ramp. Both men are wearing their ‘battle jackets’ and ‘crust pants’ – items of clothing adorned with that many band patches that they look like a low rent NASCAR. Both men stand next to one another, feet about shoulder-width apart. Dolmeth takes a swig of the cheapest can of beer he could find in the city as Cruset lifts his fist in the air. Both men make their way down the entrance ramp; Dolmeth gradually making his way through his tinnie. Jesse is the first of the duo to enter the ring as he slides in underneath the bottom rope, quickly rolling up onto a knee and spreading his arms wide. Chris on the other hand, makes his way round to the far side of the ring and marches up the ring steps. He makes his way to the centre of the ring apron and finishes off what is left of his beer before throwing the can aside. He steps into the ring via the middle rope and thrusts his fist into the air. The two men remove their jackets and give them to the ringside staff before withdrawing to their corner.


Big Rock Candy Mountain - Double Trapping Hip-Toss into Blue Thunder Bomb (Dolmeth)/Neckbreaker (Cruset) combination
Squatter's Rights - Powerbomb (Dolmeth)/Lungblower (Cruset)
Gallow Tree - Electric Chair (Dolmeth)/Tornado DDT (Cruset)
Room Spin - Big Swing (Dolmeth)/Dropkick (Cruset)
Extreme Move Terror - Back suplex (Cruset)/Running European Uppercut (Dolmeth)
Buckfast Buster - Big Boot/Brainbuster combination often followed by a seated Big Boot/Penalty Kick
Last edited by Methylated Spirit on Tue Jan 31, 2017 6:43 pm, edited 13 times in total.
User avatar
Methylated Spirit
Posts: 55
Joined: Wed Dec 23, 2015 5:36 pm
Location: UK

Re: The Crusteez

Postby Methylated Spirit » Sun Nov 13, 2016 8:06 pm

Any chance of reactivating this? Especially last time I tried to use them I was ignored ;)
*not salty at all*

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