Feedback: Card Subject To Change?

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Rob Chapman
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Characters Handled: Rob Chapman, Ethan Cross, Jace Albright
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Feedback: Card Subject To Change?

Postby Rob Chapman » Wed Nov 07, 2018 8:09 pm

viewtopic.php?f=9&t=8449

Ethan Cross and Jace Albright get booked in a match for Legends somehow. But does anybody care?

Any thoughts or feedback on the characterization, the description, and the use of Bella Quinn in particular would be nice. I had intended to do a lot more subtle build before this segment, but life didn't work out that way.
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Rob Chapman
Win/Loss Record (2005 - 2018) | 74 - 48 - 2
Win/Loss Record (Current Run) | 2 - 2 - 0

Ethan Cross
Win/Loss Record (Current Run) | 0 - 3 - 0

Jace Albright
Win/Loss Record (Current Run) | 1 - 3 - 0
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Dan
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Re: Feedback: Card Subject To Change?

Postby Dan » Wed Nov 07, 2018 11:46 pm

It was a good intro to these characters. Nice little caveat added on the match too. As far as I know, we haven't seen a whole lot of either of them in XWA, and having Bella Quinn threaten to pull Ethan from supershows sets up a sort of desperation on his behalf, despite being friends with Jace.

I love the Danny Sexbang pic base, and as always, I look forward to seeing what you write for this match. :shappy:
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GiggityGopher
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Re: Feedback: Card Subject To Change?

Postby GiggityGopher » Fri Nov 09, 2018 12:46 am

I can't speak on how accurate the portrayal of Bella was, as I, myself, don't really know too much about how the character is, but I really enjoyed her usage here. The accent came across exactly as you intended it, I feel. Like, I could tell how everything was supposed to sound while understanding what she's actually trying to say, which can be difficult when writing accents in eFedding.

The small glimpse we got at the characters of Jace and Ethan here was good. Jace comes off as a really likeable guy (but, I mean, Daniel Avidan is his picbase, so how the fuck can't he be?) and Ethan's eagerness to break out, while possibly biting off more than he can chew, really paints a picture of what the character is.
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